Kiddo Blog in L.A. 13

The most gorgeous guy contacted me today on the dating website. I had never seen someone so perfect. Of course, not wanting to lie, I send them three more recent photos, and now I know I will never hear from him again. Anyway, for one full second there, I was allowed to dream.

Yesterday I deeply needed to hear the voice of my Kiddo, I called, left a message, and of course, not understand my desperation, he never called back. Well tonight I don’t feel the need to talk to him. I’m listening to The Smiths videos, I’m drinking beers (my fourth one now), so I have all the fuel I need.

Funny how Morrissey’s songs over the years, always appeared to be perfect for the moments I was living, and how perfectly I was thinking everything he sings about. Must be destiny, I always thought. However, he was just very honest in his songs, and this universal. Which brings the question, is anyone else actually honest when they write their songs? Since I cannot connect to any of them, I guess the answer is no.

Which brings me to my own books and how dark they are, and honest, and how people connect to them. I guess to find people as depressed as you are, is a comforting thought and ultimately make you happy. Glad that such black material could actually help the people on the same wavelength. Of course, it is completely incompatible with anyone who I actually happy to live this life. Those people need to go see their doctor, no matter how much it costs here in the U.S., as they are certainly not normal, as it is quite clear that in the life we all lead at the moment, happiness just cannot be part of the equation. I can see you don’t know what I am talking about, never mind. You must be one of those happy ones, go and get lost then.